Hosing out the garbage dumpster this morning I thought, “M is for maggots!” and found myself composing a sort of Young Victorian’s Guide to Pestilence.

A is for ANTS, that march in formation,
Ravage our picnic and consume our collation.

B is for BEDBUGS, that nip in the night—
So shake out your mattress, and make it up tight!

C is for COCKROACH, whose nocturnal skittling
Frightens the maid, and ruins the victualling.

There being no call for this whatever, I’ll stop there.